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Oh, Everett Herald, thou art morons!!

Posted in Boys Basketball, Poking the Herald on January 27, 2013| Leave a Comment »

"You have made Wiley mad, Everett Herald. You wouldn't like Wiley when he gets mad." (Shelli Trumbull photo)

“You have made Wiley mad! You wouldn’t like Wiley when he’s mad!!” (Shelli Trumbull photo)

I know. I know. I know.

Every newspaper misspells athlete names. I may have even done it once or twice or 43,982 times in my career. It happens.

But oh lord does the Everett Herald specialize in it.

It would be interesting to know if other schools bear an equal brunt of their name-mangling, or whether they reserve a special heapin’ helpin’ of incompetence for Coupeville High School and its boys’ basketball team in particular.

Week in and week out, they mangle Ben Etzell (Ezzel, Ezel), Aaron Curtin (Curtain), Drew Chan (Chanv, Chon), Anthony Bergeron (Bucchoson, Burgeson) and the list goes on and on (is it Walstad? Walsted? Walstid? Walstod? Walstud? Yes, definitely Walstud.)

And how exactly do you get from Bergeron to Bucchoson in the first place? Well, you did get the first and last letters right…

But now we add a new name to that hallowed list of mangled Wolf names first made famous by Taya Boonstra becoming Taya Boonscara during her days in the red and black.

Our new winner?

Wolf freshman Wiley Hesselgrave made his varsity debut Friday night against Archbishop Thomas Murphy. The Herald, however, believes his name is Wiley Hessezgrabe.

Does he even look remotely Middle Eastern to you?

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Some day Anthony Bergeron will get his full name back!!

Posted in Boys Basketball, Poking the Herald, Ranting and Raving on January 5, 2013| Leave a Comment »

Anthony Bergeron (with ball), man of a 1,001 names. (Shelli Trumbull photo)

Well, they’re getting closer. Sort of.

In their never-ending crusade to mangle the name of every Coupeville High School athlete, the Everett Herald misspelled four names Friday night, while managing to come up with a new (and still incorrect) variation on Anthony Bergeron’s last name.

Once again, Drew Chan was Drew Chanv, Aaron Curtin was Aaron Curtain and Ben Etzell was Ben Ezzel.

I know where the Chan and Curtin misspellings are coming from, since the program for the Wolves opener against Blaine had those misspellings.

Etzell wasn’t eligible for opening night, however, as he still had practices to make up, and wasn’t on that roster. Every program I’ve seen since he’s been eligible spells his last name correctly, so I’m not sure where that’s coming from.

And Bergeron?

Two games ago, the Herald referred to him as Bucchoson. This time around, they changed it to Burgeson.

This, despite the fact, that, like Etzell, his name has been correct in every program this season.

So, once again, I have to fall back on my original belief — the Everett Herald either hates Coupeville or hires idiots.

Or both.

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Dear Everett Herald, are you even trying?!?!

Posted in Boys Basketball, Poking the Herald, Ranting and Raving on January 3, 2013| Leave a Comment »

“My name is Anthony Bergeron. You killed my name. Prepare to die!” (Shelli Trumbull photo)

There are days when I think they are doing it on purpose.

Is it even humanly possible for journalists to misspell so many names from the same school for such an extended period of time without having some kind of ulterior motive? Does the Everett Herald harbor a grudge against Coupeville High School?

Perhaps the Herald writers are still stinging from the incident at the start of fall, when Wolf Nation rose up and torpedoed their football fan poll, outvoting the fat cats at ATM and King’s and giving Coupeville the preseason crown.

Maybe it was when we buried them under emails reminding them “He’s not stumblin’, he’s rumblin’, he’s Jake Tumblin!!”

Or maybe they just can’t spell.

Because, continuing a tradition fine-tuned during the heyday of Taya Boonstra (forever immortalized as Taya Boonscara by Herald writers), they are back at it, massacring Coupeville names like the Huns rolling over Europe, just with a lot less finesse.

Wednesday night presented them with a rare opportunity to misspell four Wolf names, as Drew Chan became Chanv, Aaron Curtin became Curtain and Ben Etzell became Ezzel. Which was a nice start.

The topper though, the one that makes no sense whatsoever (the first three are reasonably close), is when they turned Anthony Bergeron into Anthony Bucchoson.

What?!?!

You got the B at the start and the N at the end right, and then you had a stroke on us, it appears.

I was going to alert the Washington Newspapers Publishers Association. Maybe I should just call 9-1-1 instead.

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Ladies and gents … Taya Boonscara!!

Posted in Poking the Herald, Ranting and Raving, Whidbey's Best on November 30, 2012| Leave a Comment »

Taya Boonstra, semi-serious.

Visibly impressed by the pomp of Senior Night.

Boonstra and Mitch Pelroy.

Taya Boonstra was the bomb!

The photo bomber, that is. During her delightful four-year run as a Wolf athlete (volleyball, basketball, softball, cheer), the brilliant young woman born as Tatiana took great joy in always knowing where the camera was and playing to it whenever possible.

She was the female equivalent of Hunter “he’s gold, Jerry, gold!!” Hammer, just about a foot shorter.

But I bring her up today not for her feisty play on the court and in the field, or her habit of making photos just that much better.

I bring her up because, once again, a new hoops season has been kicked off by the Everett Herald massacring the names of Wolf players, and, when it comes to that, Boonstra is the patron saint.

At one point in her hoops career, the spelling-challenged Herald referred to her as Taya Boonscara, which, admittedly, is kind of cool sounding.

Thursday night/Friday morning, they were back at it, managing to misspell the names of four of the six Wolf players who scored against Cedar Park Christian. Three of six, if you don’t want to get all nit-picky and call them out on dropping the second capitol letter in Jai’Lysa Hoskins first name.

I, however, feel like being all nit-picky, so it counts!

We’ll give credit where credit is due, as the Herald somehow stumbled blindly into getting Hailey Hammer and Breeanna Messner correct.

But then they turned Makana Stone into Mahana Stone, Amanda Fabrizi into Amanda Fabrici and Bessie Walstad into Bessie Walsted.

The last one continues a four-year tradition of messin’ with Bessie, as they have run virtually every letter in the alphabet through her last name at various points.

My favorite — when they called her Walstud. Which, based on her superior play in multiple sports over her high school career, is actually kind of appropriate.

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