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50,000 reasons to join the revolution!!

Posted in Poking the Canucks, Ranting and Raving on January 3, 2013| Leave a Comment »

Canada never saw the wedgie coming.

50,000.

That’s how many page views we’ve pulled in so far, in less than five months.

And, even though our bread and butter is covering, as the name of the site says, Coupeville sports, it seems there is some universal appeal. Our readership is spread out, not just across Whidbey Island, but across the United States, and, for that matter, across the globe.

Ever since I did a feature on foreign exchange student turned Wolf cheerleader Iris Ryckaert, I’ve maintained a loyal following out of Belgium. It seems once they saw photos of Hunter Hammer doin’ what Hunter Hammer does best (being page hit gold, Jerry!!), they were hooked.

If you look to your right, you’ll notice our list of sponsors have grown, as well. We have 19 now, with a 20th one (PS Hair Design) in the wings.

These businesses have joined the fight to keep local, independent journalism alive on an Island where a giant Canadian media conglomerate has slurped up all three newspapers (and then erased bylines off of work done in the old days by people such as myself).

These sponsors (and the individual donators on David’s Best Ever Friends list at the top of the site) believe JV and middle school sports deserve to be covered just as much as varsity sports.

They buy into the mad dream that one day I will have accomplished my goal of doing a feature story on EVERY SINGLE ATHLETE who pulls on a uniform for the Wolves — even if I have to tie Kole Kellison down and force him to talk into the tape recorder.

They are us. We are they. Together, whether we live here in Coupeville or read my words from afar, we are all Wolf Nation.

United we can give Canada a wedgie the likes of which they have never felt before.

To commemorate the 50,000th page view, I’m offering sponsorship ads for $100 for the life of the site.

Not the $250 we started at. $100 and you’re on here forever!

Write your checks to: David Svien.

Mail them to: 145 N. Sherman, Coupeville, WA 98239.

Or hand them to me at the next game. Unlike Canada, which goes home at 4:30, I actually follow the mantra of Bill O’Reilly — “We’ll do it live!!”

Do it because you want to cheese off the Canucks. Do it because you believe in independent journalism. Do it for the kids.

Whatever your reason may be, your help makes a difference. And your ad will be noticed.

50,000 page views don’t lie.

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Dear Everett Herald, are you even trying?!?!

Posted in Boys Basketball, Poking the Herald, Ranting and Raving on January 3, 2013| Leave a Comment »

“My name is Anthony Bergeron. You killed my name. Prepare to die!” (Shelli Trumbull photo)

There are days when I think they are doing it on purpose.

Is it even humanly possible for journalists to misspell so many names from the same school for such an extended period of time without having some kind of ulterior motive? Does the Everett Herald harbor a grudge against Coupeville High School?

Perhaps the Herald writers are still stinging from the incident at the start of fall, when Wolf Nation rose up and torpedoed their football fan poll, outvoting the fat cats at ATM and King’s and giving Coupeville the preseason crown.

Maybe it was when we buried them under emails reminding them “He’s not stumblin’, he’s rumblin’, he’s Jake Tumblin!!”

Or maybe they just can’t spell.

Because, continuing a tradition fine-tuned during the heyday of Taya Boonstra (forever immortalized as Taya Boonscara by Herald writers), they are back at it, massacring Coupeville names like the Huns rolling over Europe, just with a lot less finesse.

Wednesday night presented them with a rare opportunity to misspell four Wolf names, as Drew Chan became Chanv, Aaron Curtin became Curtain and Ben Etzell became Ezzel. Which was a nice start.

The topper though, the one that makes no sense whatsoever (the first three are reasonably close), is when they turned Anthony Bergeron into Anthony Bucchoson.

What?!?!

You got the B at the start and the N at the end right, and then you had a stroke on us, it appears.

I was going to alert the Washington Newspapers Publishers Association. Maybe I should just call 9-1-1 instead.

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The best film you saw in 2012 is called “Trick Baby?” What a frickin’ surprise!!

Posted in 2012: Looking Back, Movie Mania, Ranting and Raving on December 31, 2012| Leave a Comment »

I have been told, frequently and loudly, that my taste in movies is a bit off-kilter.

After 15 years in the trenches at Videoville and David’s DVD Den, a time when I hailed Hands on a Hard Body, Reefer Madness: The Movie Musical and Bottle Rocket as my favorite films of their respective years, it’s probably not worth the breath to argue that it is I, and not the crowd, that is correct.

Which brings us to 2012, a time long after the death of the video stores, but a time when I still managed to watch an even 400 films, from Forbidden Zone to Katy Perry: Part of Me. More than a few of which would probably be considered “a bit off-kilter.”

Well, actually, I saw more than that, but I’m just counting the ones that caressed or scarred my eyeballs for the first time. I’m not counting that 277th viewing of The Hudsucker Proxy or the six times I’ve returned to see pieces of Boogie Nights again, thanks to its near-constant rotation on pay channels coming in free on a DirectTV deal.

But we’re not here to talk about why the ’90s kicked unholy ass at the movies. We’re here to talk about what I saw in 2012, which ranged from The Hobbit in 48-frames-per-second 3D on a huge screen to 1976’s Massacre at Central High in VHS-copied-to-YouTube Crap-O-Vision on a much-smaller computer screen.

P.S. — Massacre at Central High was better.

I saw great films. I saw God-awful films. Freed from the constraints of video store life, I watched whatever I dang well felt like — which meant a lot of horrid to semi-good Italian crime thrillers from the ’70s.

Bleary-eyed but not totally fulfilled (I don’t get to see Django Unchained, Les Miserables or Life of Pi until tomorrow, kicking off 2013 in style), I can look back and say one thing for sure. My favorite movie I saw in 2012 was … 1972’s Trick Baby!

A great blast of street-wise grifters, backstabbing and dirty deeds done dirt cheap, it stars the late, great Kiel Martin of Hill Street Blues fame and pimp-slaps you for 89 sizzlin’ minutes, right down to its bleak finale. My first try at getting it through Netflix was ruined by a broken disc with a visible footprint. My second try? Well worth the wait.

What else made my heart flutter this past year? The rest of my Top 40, in alphabetic order. Disagree? Won’t be the first time.

The Adventures of Tintin (2011) — I read every one of the comics 200 times as a kid. This was everything I hoped for, and more.

All the Boys Love Mandy Lane (2006) — Criminally overlooked homage to ’80s slashers, mixed with a Columbine-era look at evil that festers and wounds from within.

Argo (2012) — Slam-bang true-life thriller, with cynically funny Hollywood lifers providing a counter-point to the very real life-and-death ordeal being played out in Iran.

The Artist (2011) — Sublime.

Bernie (2011) — Jack Black pulls a 180-degree turn and scores in a true-crime dark comedy about a model citizen coming unwound one strand at a time.

Brave (2012) — Best animated ginger hair … ever.

Bullhead (2011) — Brutal foreign crime drama is like a (really painful) punch to the nads.

Burke and Hare (2010) — Cheeky tale of blokes getting by, one stolen dead body at a time.

The Cabin in the Woods (2011) — The antidote to 30 years of cinematic horror film crap.

Cold Weather (2010) — “Portlandia” as detective story.

The Descendants (2011) — George Clooney gives good cry.

Detention (2011) — A killer on the loose, time traveling bears, dastardly Canadians, brain swapping — The Breakfast Club had an illegitimate child with Halloween (the ’70s one), and that child is one sick, twisted bastard.

Don’t Go in the Woods (2010) — ’80s slasher films re-imagined as an indie musical. 99% of the world hated it. I loved every bloody second.

Eating Raoul (1982) — Eat the swingers!

The Guard (2011) — Dead-pan Irish comedy with Brendan Gleeson, star of the great dead-pan 1997 Irish comedy I Went Down. That time he was a hit man, this time he’s a cop who is twice as rotten to the core.

Goon (2011) — Best profane, bloody, hilarious hockey movie yet. Yeah, you heard me, Slap Shot, the crown has been taken.

The Grey (2011) — Liam Neeson punches wolves, refuses to let the light die.

Hannie Caulder (1971) — Raquel Welch in chaps.

The Ides of March (2011) — George Clooney gives good ooze.

I Saw the Devil (2010) — Ultra-violent foreign flick about the dangers of being a serial killer, if said killer pisses off the wrong unhinged cop.

Jack Reacher (2012) — Tom Cruise has issues, but being a reliable action star film after film ain’t one of them.

Kill List (2011) — Creepy as all get-out British crime flick turned … something else.

Looper (2012) — Bruce Willis vs. Joseph Gordon Leavitt. We all win.

Melancholia (2011) — Kirsten Dunst has a gloriously miserable trip into oblivion.

Moonrise Kingdom (2012) — Wes Anderson keeps on keepin’ on.

Mother (2009) — Never mess with a pissed-off Korean mama.

Myth of the American Sleepover (2010) — The kids are alright.

The Perfect Host (2010) — Who knew Niles Crane could be so freaky?

Red Cliff (2008) — John Woo makes his Kurosawa film and burns down half of China in the process. Brutal and beautiful.

The Robber (2010) — Stark portrait of a man who comes alive only when running, either in foot races or in a bid to escape bank guards.

The Rum Diary (2011) — Johnny Depp gets soused.

Safety Not Guaranteed (2012) — You’re only insane if the time machine DOESN’T work. If it does, then, well, you’re a temperamental genius.

Skateland (2010) — Beautiful, low-key, like Dazed and Confused reborn in a skate rink.

Super (2010) — Truly shocking. Truly hilarious. A great superhero flick about insane people wearing homemade costumes and paying the price for their chutzpah.

Take Shelter (2011) — Michael Shannon goes bug-nuts insane as only Micheal Shannon can.

Thin Ice (2011) — Not the Coen brothers, but dang close.

21 Jump Street (2012) — Best surprise of the year: Channing Tatum is hilarious.

Under the Rainbow (1981) — Chevy Chase when Chevy Chase was funny.

The Yellow Sea (2010) — Never mess with a pissed-off Korean daddy.

For the complete list of what I saw in 2012 — http://www.imdb.com/list/R4Am1NvUn8U/

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Madison Tisa McPhee is awesome (and a few other random thoughts)!!

Posted in 2012: Looking Back, Poking the Canucks, Ranting and Raving on December 31, 2012| Leave a Comment »

Wolf Baby officially endorses Madison Tisa McPhee as the Most Awesome Wolf of 2012. (Shelli Trumbull photo)

It’s Dec. 31, 2012 and I’m still not Vincent Nattress.

Shot to the ribs! One last jab at the Whidbey Examiner and their Canadian Corporate Overlords, who managed to steal my bylines, hand them to someone else, scrub my stories from their database and thoroughly take a crap on 15 years of my writing.

Well, at least I got paid well for my time and … no, actually I didn’t, did I?

Which is at least part of the reason I became big in Belgium in 2012.

Part of coupevillesports.com is to give something back to the community and part of it is to inflict a wedgie on those who sold out the dream of independent journalism as soon as the first Canuck pay-off cleared at the bank.

So, what have I accomplished in these first 4.5 months, since I launched August 16?

431 posts. 780 photos. 20 sponsors. Numerous pissed off folks at Archbishop Thomas Murphy and Sultan and a few up Canada way. A few down this way, as well, as my number one commentator was a woman upset with my coverage of a missing local fisherman.

But, like I said, I’m big in Belgium, which is neck-and-neck with Canada as my second biggest readership base, trailing (surprise, surprise) the United States. My feature on Belgian foreign exchange student/Wolf cheerleader Iris Ryckaert got me started and at least some of those readers are still checking in on an almost daily basis.

So, I’ve got that going for me, which is nice.

Overall, it’s been a nice ride so far, with big wins (suck it South Whidbey! suck it even harder Sultan!!), big announcements (Toni Crebbin retires, CHS kills The Wobble), nice quotes (“Does this school have good insurance?”), synchronized barfing (not as pretty as it sounds…), big shots to the nads (Gavin O’ Keefe breaks his leg, Ryan Griggs moves to Arizona) and superstars doing what superstars do (Breeanna Messner KO’s Orcas Island, Luke Merriman hits TWO buzzer-beating three point bombs in one middle school game, Jake Tumblin lays waste to Chimacum in the football finale).

And a special mention to two Wolves, Joel Walstad and Madison Tisa McPhee.

Walstad gets props for stuffing former teammate Taylor Ebersole’s shot during a basketball game at La Conner, proving the best players stay on Whidbey and don’t run away and cry to daddy at the first sign of trouble.

And MTM? Great hurdler. Great soccer player. But what makes her extra special was she let me run a photo of her taken in a Seattle ER mere moments after she smushed her nose something terrible in a collision on the pitch — the very definition of “breaking news.”

She could have told me to stick it where the sun don’t shine, and that was probably her first thought. But she didn’t, cause she’s awesome.

Caleb Valko gave good smack-talkin’. Messner, Nick Streubel, Bessie Walstad, Nathan Lamb and many more shone brightly in 2012. Gabe Wynn and Tiffany Briscoe are the future, and the future is bright.

But the MVP of the first 4.5 months? MTM, hands down.

Now just don’t break anything else. I’d rather write about you winning a state track title than to go all TMZ on you again.

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A little coal and then the promise of a better tomorrow!!

Posted in Boys Basketball, Cheer, Girls Basketball, Ranting and Raving on December 24, 2012| Leave a Comment »

Answer four more questions, Elena Jimenez Guerra, and you win your very own feature story! (John Fisken photo)

What would I like for Christmas?

Well, I would love for the Whidbey Examiner and its Canadian Corporate Overlords to restore my bylines. I’m still not Vincent Nattress and they still don’t care.

But, after a mildly polite email or two from them, the point seems to be moot, as the only thing that has changed is most of my stories that had the wrong byline have now just been scrubbed from the Examiner web site.

Now, they sit out there, lost in cyberspace with the other 97.6% of the stories I wrote over the past three years, trapped in the land of Page Not Found.

I assume that’s where my Washington Newspaper Publishers Association Awards from last year now reside as well, since I have yet to see either one of the two the Examiner accepted on my behalf at the end of September.

But you now, who cares?

The simple fact is more people are reading these words than ever read any of my stories for the Examiner.

So, if they want to scrub my presence from the Examiner, old school-Soviet style, so be it. Very few people will notice.

And, I will move on to other things, such as continually kicking their asses.

I have produced 424 articles in the four months this site has been up. The Examiner and News-Times combined have produced … well, let’s just say a whole lot less.

The insane project to eventually do a feature story on EVERY SINGLE athlete playing a sport at Coupeville High School, varsity or JV, current or past, continues unabated, and we will get there, even if I have to (politely) harass Kenzie Kooch and Kole “Does this school have good insurance?” Kellison another 2,692 times.

With the holidays upon us, the stories may slow down for a few days, but they will pick back up again.

High school basketball returns Wednesday, Jan. 2 and girls’ middle school basketball starts in mid-to-late Jan.

There are 21 potential features sitting out there right now, based on who originally said yes to answering questions. Now it depends on whether or not people find the time and desire to follow through, or, in the case of Spanish exchange student/Wolf cheerleader Elena Jimenez Guerra, answer questions 6-9 (she did 1-5 then vanished on me).

If you know these people, anticipate the stories OR put some subtle pressure on them:

Former CHS stars Mitch Aparicio, Natasha Bamberger, Aimee Bishop, Ross Buckner, Kirsty Croghan, Corinne Gaddis and Georgie Smith.

Current CHS athletes Lyndsi Applegarth, Kylie Burge, Emily Clay, Lauren Escalle, Jared Helmstadter, Jimenez Guerra, Morgan Payne and Wynter Thorne.

You can still do it, even though your season went by: Kellison, Kooch, Megan Oakes, Kelsey Pape, Paul Schmakeit and Rachel Wenzel.

And what if you’re a current or former Wolf athlete, your name is not on that list and I haven’t written a feature on you yet?

Contact me at davidsvien@hotmail.com. Demand your time in the spotlight. Bribe me with baked goods.

I’m surprisingly easy.

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