Jacob Zettle was in the thick of things on defense all night Friday, doing his best to slow down Port Townsend’s very slippery QB. (John Fisken photo)
Dear Alex Heilig,
We know each other by sight, if little else.
You were an assistant football coach at Coupeville High School for a bit, but my conversations at the time were with your boss and not you.
You were also briefly the track coach at CMS, but largely ignored me when I tried to get meet results.
Which is neither here nor there.
You were busy, a teacher, coach and new husband, then new father. And I know for a fact I can be annoying.
I feel the need to tread sort of carefully here, as your wife, Ashley, is one of my favorite people in the entire world.
I knew her before you did, when she was one of the best athletes our town has ever seen, and when we worked together behind the counter at Videoville.
She is a truly wonderful person, and I think the world of her. If she’s married to you, I have no doubt you’re a good guy.
Which is why, instead of calling you names or flinging anger at you, I would instead like to merely express my disappointment.
When you became head football coach at Port Townsend this year, after a year as an assistant at South Whidbey and a year as head coach at Granite Falls, you scored. Big time.
The RedHawks have a proud football tradition, and when you stepped in, you inherited some stellar athletes like Berkley Hill, Detrius Kelsall and Gerry Coker.
You’ve taken what was given you, and you’ve done well, going 4-2 (a play away from 5-1).
Friday night your team came to Coupeville, with you, the prodigal son returning on Homecoming, and you waxed the Wolves 57-0.
It was a classic example of one-sided football.
Your team won every battle, blowing people off the lines and letting your super-slippery QB, Hill, slice through the Wolf defense, scoring four touchdowns on the ground and tossing a fifth through the air.
Kelsall also scored three times, twice on the ground and once on that Hill pass.
Other than a 30-yard run off a fake punt by Clay Reilly and some late-game heroics by freshman running back Sean Toomey-Stout, who went 15 yards on his first varsity carry, it was not an especially bright night for CHS.
The Wolves are now 2-4 overall, 1-2 in league play, a team that looks great at times and like a work in progress at others.
But this is where it gets sticky.
It’s not that you won 57-0 that bothers me. Good teams often score a lot of points.
It’s the way you chose to stick the knife in and twist it that irritates me (and probably a lot of other people.)
When you’re up 41-0 at the break, on a running clock in the second half and your opponent has pulled all of its primary starters on both sides of the ball in the final quarter, what compels you to leave your (probably) All-League QB in to run up the score?
There’s 6:44 to play, the game is 50-0, Coupeville’s defense is all second-stringers and yet you leave your first-string offense in to ram home one more score.
Why?
Like I said, we’ve never really talked, so I’d just be guessing.
I understand your backup QB is a freshman. He’s also maybe the best pure athlete on your team.
He probably would have scored himself, given the opportunity to go under center some time before the 1:55 mark of the game.
To someone who really doesn’t know you, leaving Hill and his line in to score a meaningless touchdown against JV players reeked of bush league.
You didn’t need to do it that way. You chose to do it that way.
And like I said, I adore Ashley and if she vouches for you, I don’t really have a problem with you.
It’s your team, it’s your style, and so be it.
You’re a coach, I’m an idiot blogger in another town, you don’t really need to lose much sleep over what I think.
But, if, in a few weeks, your team gets blown out by Cascade Christian (as I’m now hoping), I’m not going to feel real sorry for you, that’s for sure.
Sincerely,
David Svien
Coupeville Sports 
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