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Archive for the ‘Ranting and Raving’ Category

CHS coach Tony Maggio just saw game film on King’s. He’s going to need a minute.

This is not going to be easy. That’s for sure.

But they said the same thing to the 1980 U.S. hockey team. The ’85 Villanova hoop squad. The 1950 U.S. mens’ soccer team. The 2007 Statue of Liberty-pullin’ Boise State football team. Bobby Plump and the ’54 Milan High School basketball squad (think “Hoosiers”). Rulon Gardner on the Greco-Roman wrestling mats at the 2000 Olympics. Buster Douglas knocking the crud out of the baddest man on the planet, Mike Tyson.

They play the games for a reason. Because anything can happen between the first whistle and the last whistle.

And regardless of every stat, every pundit, there is a chance Coupeville High School will march on to Mickey Clark Field this Friday, Oct. 19 and shock the world by stepping all over all-world quarterback Billy Green and his previously perfect King’s squad.

And, if they do, the Wolves will be the number one 1A school in the Cascade Conference, grab an automatic berth to tri-districts and make the world of Washington state high school football collectively soil its britches.

But it’s not going to be easy.

King’s, the school that whipped ATM so badly they fired their coach after just four games (oh, I’m sorry, he “resigned,” did he? That’s what they call it when you get locked out of your office?), is 7-0 and has outscored its opponents 338-70.

With Green, a Brigham Young University recruit, whipping 29 touchdowns through the air (with just two interceptions), the Knights have scored between 40 and 62 points in every game this season.

A line anchored by Yale recruit Mason Friedline has given him plenty of time to operate and Green has picked apart defenses for nearly 1,600 yards, with Caleb Taylor (748 yards, 14 TDs) and Ben Welch (7 TDs) being his primary targets.

When the Knights do take a break from the air express, their ground game is paced by Trevor Hansen, who has rumbled for 400+ yards.

So, they’re good at running up the score on other teams. We get it.

But remember that little story from that best-selling book, what was it called … oh yes, the Bible? About a plucky young guy who picked up some stones and went upside the head of the #1 ranked fighter in all the land?

Coupeville is David in this version of the story and Goliath is about to go down face-first, cause Goliath always goes down. Hard.

So this is where CHS unleashes its justifiably vaunted running attack (Jake Tumblin and Brent Arnold are among the league leaders in yards, while Danny Savalza, Bryce Fleming and Josh Bayne ain’t too bad themselves). Where they disrupt the King’s passing attack and bust out some game-breaking pick sixes.

Where they reach down and channel their Chaminade University, circa 1982 (look it up … that’s why we have the internet!) and stun the universe.

Write the legend, Wolves!

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Spell-check. Man’s best friend.

Right before you enter the Coupeville High School gym for tonight’s volleyball game, take a look at the mural on the wall to your right.

It’s inspirational. It’s literary. It’s … not right.

The man’s name was Rudyard Kipling. One “P”, no “S”.

Does anyone have any white-out?

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Be nice to this woman. She’s football royalty.

Now is the time to make nice with Coupeville businesswoman Lynda Richards.

You need to get in good with the co-owner of The Lovejoy Inn on Front Street, if you have any slim hopes of one day snagging some free NFL tickets. It might be a long shot that she’ll bestow some on you, of course, but it doesn’t hurt being nice to her anyway, as she and her family (husband Mitch and trio of whip-smart daughters) are pretty dang nice and would deserve it anyway.

But why the sudden interest in Mrs. Richards and her potential link to football tickets, you ask?

Her cousin Johnny has a son, and he’s a beast. In the best way.

Drew Wolitarsky, a 6-foot-3, 210-pound receiver at Canyon High School, is no mere high school football player. As of last Friday, he is the all-time receiving yards leader in the history of California high school football.

Yes, California. The biggest state of them all. We’re not talking about the best player from Delaware here.

Wolitarsky, who has more college scholarship offers than you can imagine (with interest from the Pac-12 to the SEC), has hauled in 240 passes for 4,585 yards in his high school career, with several games remaining.

His yardage total now bests former Taft High School star Steve Smith, who merely went on to be an All-Pac-10 and All-American player for Southern Cal and now plays for the St. Louis Rams. Smith also won a Super Bowl title with the New York Giants, has been selected for the NFL Pro Bowl and holds the Giants single-season record for receptions.

Now, of course, it’s premature to think that Wolitarsky will continue to eclipse Smith. But that doesn’t mean football fans shouldn’t prepare for all possibilities.

So be nice to Lynda Richards. You never know what she might be able to do for you in the future.

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So, there I was, minding my own business, when I heard a commotion from the kitchen.

I went to investigate and discovered that Bob, the lead banana in my fruit bowl, was throwing a fit. It seems he had taken a look at a Coupeville High School volleyball roster that I had left on the counter, and, gobsmacked by what he saw, had attempted to throw himself onto the offending paper.

At first I knew not what had upset him so terribly, until I looked closer and saw it for myself.

Right there in black and white (and all season long, something I confirmed by looking back at rosters from previous games), CHS had been misspelling their own coach’s name.

The horror! The horror!

Unless, this whole time, Toni Crebbin was actually just an alias and Tini Cribbin was her real name.

Which made me wonder what else she might be hiding from her past. Was she in the witness relocation program, on the run after a lifetime of mob hits? Had she been a Celine Dion impersonator back East and just wanted a fresh start, someplace where her heart could go on (and be devoted to volleyball, instead)?

Questions. So many questions.

And probably the biggest one of them all — when exactly on this slow Sunday had I lost my marbles?

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This photo, by itself, is 100% more Homecoming parade photos than the Canadian-funded “local” news rags have given us this weekend. (Shelli Trumbull photo)

Oh, Canada…

The “local” papers you fund seem to think it’s still 1935 and everyone is waiting for their newspaper to arrive on the stoop mid-week, along with a couple of glass jugs of milk. Because that’s the only explanation I can think of for their absolute dereliction of duty these days.

Last week, Coupeville High School won its first football game of the season, thrashing Orcas Island 47-14 at a field ACROSS THE STREET from the building that houses the Whidbey News-Times, Whidbey Examiner and South Whidbey Record. It took them 63 hours, however, for the first news of that game to hit their websites.

You know, a website, the thing that powers news coverage in 2012.

During those 63 hours, coupevillesports.com — a one-man operation chugging along without a salary, a benefits package, free doughnuts in the break room and honorary Canadian citizenship granted by having your paychecks endorsed by Manitoba — posted nine articles.

This week, a little thing called Homecoming. A parade. A game. A half-time show. Sort of a big deal in a town the size of Coupeville.

And yet we sit here on Sunday morning, more than 36 hours since the game against Granite Falls ended, and what does Sound Publishing/Black Press and its “local” papers have to offer?

Diddly and squat. Cause it’s 1935, apparently.

Do I even need to mention that coupevillesports.com — one man in a bunker under Penn Cove typing on a computer run by three hamsters on a treadmill — has already posted eight articles (and numerous pictures from my vast network of local moms) during this time?

Cause it’s 2012 and there’s a thing called the internet.

Somewhere in the hinterlands of Canada, there’s a bean counter or two who has to be wondering just what their filthy Canuck greenbacks are paying for right now, because it certainly isn’t timely coverage of Coupeville sports and community events.

Must be some really incredible doughnuts in that break room.

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