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“We’re #1! We don’t have a team, but we’re #1!!!”

Psst, someone tell the Washington Interscholastic Activities Association its basketball rankings system is still broken.

It was just days ago that the WIAA finally corrected — after three weeks — the fact it had a boys’ hoops squad ranked #1 despite that team not actually existing this season.

You can read about it here:

WIAA ranks seemingly non-existent boys’ hoops team #1

And now the cucumber sandwich eatin’ scalawags are back at it.

A scan of the WIAA’s RPI rankings Tuesday reveals the sudden emergence of something called Firm Foundation Christian as the new #1 among 1B girls.

Not Neah Bay, not Crosspoint, not Mount Vernon Christian — the triple threat trio of the division.

Firm Foundation Christian.

The Eagles boast a 1-0 record, with a win Jan. 9 over the Washington School for the Deaf, which is 2-2, and … oh, here we go again.

When you click through from the WIAA, you find Firm Foundation Christian doesn’t even list a girls’ basketball team on its site, just a boys’ team.

Look over at the Washington School for the Deaf, and its girls’ team shows a 2-1 record, not 2-2, with no record of any contest against Firm Foundation Christian.

So off I went to the actual school website for Firm Foundation Christian … and, yep, no active girls’ hoops program.

The Eagles currently offer volleyball and boys’ basketball and plan to offer girls’ basketball in the future.

And when that first team arrives at some later date, it’ll be nice to know the program has already been ranked #1 in the state.

So, they got that going for them, which is nice.

The WIAA, which uses those RPI rankings when it goes to seed teams for the state playoffs?

Them folks still need to put down the cucumber sandwiches and keep a closer eye on their computers, which appear to be going haywire worse than SkyNet.

Otherwise, we all might start thinking the organization isn’t very good at this whole ranking thing.

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Coupeville 8th grader Taylor Marrs is playing high school hoops while attending middle school. (Photos by JohnsPhotos.net)

The new year is only nine days old, and yet the milestones are starting to pile up.

Four different Coupeville High School basketball players recorded their first varsity buckets during the first game of 2024, the same night Logan Downes cracked the 1,000-point club.

Seniors Reese Wilkinson, Kayla Arnold, and Timothy Nitta, and sophomore Aiden O’Neill gained entrance to the exclusive club while in Darrington, forever cementing their status as made men (and women).

Overall, the Wolves have produced 1,646 points this season, and we can properly award 1,620 of them to the players who popped the ball through the net.

Those other 26, scored on a night when the scorebook operator went AWOL on the JV girls? That’ll haunt us forever.

But, to the best of our abilities, here’s how things break down through Jan. 9:

 

Varsity – Girls
(11 games)

Katie Marti – 89
Mia Farris – 73
Madison McMillan – 58
Lyla Stuurmans – 29
Teagan Calkins – 27
Jada Heaton – 27
Haylee Armstrong – 12
Skylar Parker – 8
Kayla Arnold – 2
Bryley Gilbert – 2
Reese Wilkinson – 2

 

JV – Girls
(7 games)

Haylee Armstrong – 66
Tenley Stuurmans – 43
Bryley Gilbert – 30
Capri Anter – 16
Lexis Drake – 14
Adie Maynes – 12
Brynn Parker – 12
Teagan Calkins – 9
Taylor Marrs – 6
Chelsi Stevens – 5
Ari Cunningham – 3

**Missing 26 points​​**

 

Varsity – Boys
(11 games)

Logan Downes – 257
Cole White  96
Chase Anderson – 87
Ryan Blouin – 77
Hunter Bronec – 48
Nick Guay – 28
Hurlee Bronec – 18
William Davidson – 10
Zane Oldenstadt – 7
Quinten Simpson-Pilgrim – 4
Timothy Nitta – 2
Aiden O’Neill – 2
Mikey Robinett – 2

 

JV – Boys:
(8 games)

Camden Glover – 104
Jack Porter – 83
Johnny Porter – 71
Aiden O’Neill – 55
Landon Roberts – 54
Riley Lawless – 27
Jayden McManus – 16
Davin Houston – 10
Easton Green – 8
Malachi Somes – 5
Makai Myles – 4

Wolf seniors love to score on the hardwood.

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Pro hoops star Makana Stone watches a rival player clang a shot off the rim. (Photo property Simeon Bacolod)

That first quarter was a killer.

Throw it out and Sunday’s Norwegian women’s pro hoops game between Ammerud and Ulriken was a close affair.

Unfortunately for Coupeville grad Makana Stone and company, the first 10 minutes are part of the official score, and a 42-2 deficit at the first break fueled a 109-62 loss to the league leaders.

The defeat drops Ammerud to 3-9, while Ulriken sits atop the standings at 9-1.

The Queens, who were led by Stone’s 16-point, three-rebound, two-assist performance, rallied in the second quarter, prevailing 22-18 across the frame.

That slightly cut the deficit to 60-24 at the half, but then Ulriken, which was led by 24 points from all-world gunner Stine Austgulen, stretched the margin back out to 86-42 by the end of the third.

Stone and her hardwood compatriots get a week off, returning to action next Sunday, Jan. 14, when Ammerud will clash with Baerum, which sits at 5-6.

Now in her third season of overseas hoops action, the former Wolf ace has racked up 257 points, 135 rebounds, 38 assists, 37 steals, and seven blocks, leading the team in virtually every category.

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Mia Farris fights for a rebound. (Photo by JohnsPhotos.net)

A little bit of everything.

The Coupeville High School basketball schedule for next week features home games, a road trip, and even a spotlight contest for the boys’ JV.

The Wolves open things by welcoming non-conference foe Auburn Adventist Academy to Cow Town Monday, with all four squads slated to play.

Wednesday, the JV boys grab center stage by themselves, hosting Island rival Oak Harbor, before everyone hits the road Friday to travel to Orcas Island for Northwest 2B/1B League tilts.

Well, almost everyone, as Coupeville’s JV girls will get left behind as the Vikings don’t have enough players to fill a second squad.

As we start to move through January, games become bigger and bigger, especially for varsity teams chasing playoff berths.

Where things sit through Jan. 7:

 

Northwest League boys’ basketball:

School League Overall
MV Christian 4-0 4-8
Coupeville 2-0 8-2
La Conner 1-0 8-4
Orcas Island 2-2 5-7
Concrete 1-3 4-7
Friday Harbor 0-1 4-7
Darrington 0-4 3-7

 

Northwest League girls’ basketball:

School League Overall
MV Christian 4-0 10-3
Friday Harbor 1-0 3-8
La Conner 1-0 7-4
Darrington 2-2 5-6
Coupeville 1-1 4-6
Concrete 1-3 6-5
Orcas Island 0-4 1-9

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Makana Stone slashes to the hoop. (Photo property Simeon Bacolod)

Probably not the way they wanted to open a new year.

Returning to action Saturday in Norway, the Ammerud professional women’s basketball squad rallied late, but couldn’t quite get all the way back in a 67-62 loss to previously winless Bergen.

The loss, which came despite another epic performance from Coupeville grad Makana Stone, drops the Queens to 3-8 on the season, heading into a matchup Sunday with high-flying Ulriken, which sits at 8-1.

Ammerud led 14-13 heading into the first break Saturday, before Bergen, which entered the day at 0-9, surged ahead.

A 20-13 run in the second quarter put Bergen ahead 33-27 at the half, before a 23-13 third-quarter advantage pushed the lead out to 56-40.

While the Queens put together their best sustained offensive attack in the final frame, time eventually ran out on the comeback bid.

Stone went down swinging, however, finishing with 34 points, 14 rebounds, two assists, and seven steals.

Bergen countered by putting three players into double digits, while Ammerud is still looking for a consistent #2 to help its American assassin.

Now in her third year of overseas pro ball, Stone has racked up 241 points, 132 rebounds, 36 assists, 37 steals, and seven blocked shots this season.

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